Snack Attack
Snacks are overrated. There. I said it.
Now, before all of you snack aficionados strike a match and burn this book to ashes, please hear me out. I have learned over the years that this is a topic fraught with ire and contention and the whole topic of snacking can be quite personal and strike a nerve with many. Even health professionals and scientists cannot agree as to whether snacking in between meals is healthy or not.
But this much is clear. We are obsessed with snacking. What used to be an occasional treat is now part of our daily routines. Walk into any grocery store and typically no fewer than three aisles will be dedicated solely to snack foods. It doesn’t get much better when going to the refrigerator cases where individually portioned cheeses, meats, and even combo meals labeled as “snack packs” are available to satisfy are impending, unexpected hunger. If you stop for gas on a long road trip and use the bathroom inside the station, you will likely navigate through a maze of snack aisles filled with chips, candy, and other edibles to satisfy the appetites of the weary traveler. All of that time sitting in the car for hours is physically exhausting and sure burns the calories, so, of course, they must be replenished – STAT! At my local mall there is an entire store which sells nothing but snacks such as individual bags of chips, candy, and energy drinks. I’m glad someone finally came up with such an innovative and important concept. Going up and down the mall escalators can be very tiring and strenuous!
Sarcasm aside for a moment, I want to be clear that I am not diametrically opposed to snacking; I just believe that snacking has become out of control. I do not judge those who carry a stash of granola bars and trail mix in their purses just in case a zombie apocalypse should occur without warning. I am also acutely aware of medical conditions which require frequent intake of foods – fair enough. And, I know it’s not my place to question anyone’s personal eating schedule – eat what you want, when you want. Snacks can bring us joy and comfort and, without a doubt, they are delicious.
We all have our snacks of choice. Mine is popcorn. Growing up, it was a rare treat when my parents would allow a snack and when they did, it was popcorn. They would make it from “scratch” using the electric popcorn popper for family movie night. One time, when I was feeling particularly nostalgic and hungry from a long day at work, I bought a bag of hot, buttery popcorn at Penn Station to enjoy on the hour long ride back home to New Jersey. I had just settled in on the train, slowing enjoying the perfect culinary marriage of butter and crunchy goodness, when a gentleman sat next to me. He immediately turned to me, wrinkled forehead and all, and said, with a most disgusting tone, “You’re going to eat all of that, then eat dinner, too?” I was taken aback by his impertinent statement, and was rather slow to react, but then pulled out the granddaddy of all responses. “I’m pregnant,” I said. He got up and went to another seat. No one messes with a pregnant woman and her snacks!
When my children were young, I always had a plastic tub of Cheerios at the ready to quiet down my screaming toddlers. I know they really weren’t hungry, but Cheerios kept their mouths busy enough to squelch the sounds of their waterworks at least for a while. Although we start the programming of constant eating at home, it is perpetuated at school.
It was that exciting time of the year in late August when all of the kiddos are buying all of their school supplies, shopping for new clothes for the upcoming school year (never understood that one since the clothes they have been wearing all summer were still just fine – but I digress), and attending the school’s Open Houses. This is the time when your children meet their teachers, find their desks and neatly organize their newly sharpened #2 pencils and 24 packs of crayons. It is also the time when parents sign up for field trips, classroom parties, reading groups, and, of course, the indispensable snack schedule!
After years of obliging to the teachers’ requirements of signing up to bring “healthy” snacks for the entire class three times a year, I became defiant. “Healthy” is just a nebulous term used by manufacturers to make us believe that the product is packed with nutritional value. According to school policy, all of the items must be store-bought and individually packaged so as to prevent any contamination (insert eye roll). Call me a tree hugger, but the environmentally unfriendly packaging waste compounded with the abundance of sugar, fat, processing, and preservatives that go into these foods made this mandate untenable for me.
Maybe I was becoming cranky in my old age, but after years of dutifully providing the little darlings with yet another serving of some semblance of healthy snacks, I felt compelled to finally speak my piece. With a deep inhale, I approached a fellow mom who was placing her name on the sign-ups sheets which were taped to the chalkboard. She happened to be a friendly acquaintance of mine, so I knew I wasn’t flying into enemy territory and she may even help me convince the school to stop this nonsense. With a high degree of confidence, I asked her if she thought it was really necessary to have snacks during the school day. Her curt response was simple. “Well, of course! Children cannot learn on empty stomachs!” She walked away, her smug smile adorning her face. Conceding defeat, I grabbed the pen that she left dangling from a colorful piece of yarn, and signed my name for three more days of “healthy” snack feeding.
A couple of weeks later, I was having lunch with my 4th grade son, Justin (apparently I was one of the “cool kids”). As I sat at the lunch table, enjoying my chicken nuggets and tater tots smothered in ketchup, one of Justin’s classmates got up and headed to the trash can with almost an entire tray of food.
“Excuse me, why are you throwing away your lunch?” I asked.
“I’m not hungry. We just had snacks,” he replied.
Inhale. Exhale.
Things weren’t much better at the high school. Later in the semester, I was helping to serve a conference day dinner to the high school teachers and staff. I noticed the name badge on one of the teachers and recognized her name as my eldest son’s home room teacher.
“I am so happy to meet you, Mrs. Adams,” I said gleefully, as I extended my hand. “My son, Jason Young, is in your Connections class.”
Without returning her hand to complete the socially excepted handshake, she said, “Oh, he’s the one who doesn’t bring snack!”
“Snack?” I asked. “What are you talking about?”
“Every student is supposed to sign up to bring snacks throughout the semester. He never signed up.”
“I’ll be sure to ask him about this, but don’t you meet first thing in the morning?” I asked.
“Yes, but they are still required to bring snacks. Students learn better on a full stomach,” she said, then turned on her heels and walked away.
That evening, I asked Jason about this. He said that he never signed up to bring snacks because he thought it was “stupid” and he never ate the donuts and muffins that the other students brought in anyway, so he didn’t feel guilty about not bringing snacks. “I only eat when I’m hungry,” he said, “I’m not hungry an hour after breakfast.” Hmm… smart kid.
I contemplated this whole notion of snacks and thought back to my school days in the ‘60s and ‘70s and remembered that we never had snacks in school unless it was a special occasion, like a birthday or Valentine’s Day. I took a random, unscientific survey of others who were roughly my age and asked what their school snack experience was. Turns out that no one had snacks in school! How did we ever learn anything with our stomachs rumbling?
In addition to the idea that children cannot possibly learn anything without being fed every hour, what really gets to me is the notion of “healthy snacks”. I think of fruit of any kind, celery, carrots, hard-boiled eggs, etc. as healthy snacks. But, look in any American pantry and you will likely see granola bars – the biggest offender of healthy snacking. Sure, with bright green packaging and “Nature” in its name, it must be healthy, right? But, let’s face it – granola bars are nothing more than candy bars in disguise. In fairness though, I acknowledge that the nutritional value of granola bars on the market vary widely. But still, I’ll take a Snickers, thank you very much.
Snacks used to be treats – something served on occasion or for a special occasion. My mother frowned upon snacking and would pejoratively call snacking, “piecing between meals”. Even the old Yiddish word for snacking – noshing – does not sound in the least bit appealing. Maybe they were on to something.